Barren and Blessed

I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the  Lord  in the land of the living! Wait for the  Lord ; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the  Lord ! - Psalm 27:13-14 And then we waited. And waited. And waited. We got our clearances and fingerprints and physicals renewed every year. We changed different aspects of our profile a few times as we learned and understood more about the process, especially about the openness of adoption that is the current trend. We grew and changed a lot since first starting the adoption process. But we were still just waiting. And honestly it was very, very frustrating. It's difficult, and complicated, and expensive, and takes so much time. Why? Don't we always hear about the mass amounts of kids needing families? And about the opiate crisis flooding hospitals with addicted newborns that need a good home? We're a good home! Why is this taking so long?? I don't know, but it's frustrating. The average adoption wait ...

"In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths." - Proverbs 3:6 Since we obviously weren't the magically fertile couple I assumed we would be, after that year of trying we decided to seek a medical explanation. I underwent every infertility test known to man/woman. Some weren't so bad, some were truly horrible. H ysterosalpingogram anyone? Worst. Test. Ever. Anyway, we found out that I'm basically fine and the problem was with my husband. We were given some holistic things to try but were basically told there was next to no chance we could get pregnant on our own. And that is where my dreams really started to unravel. What do you mean we can't? Why is this so hard for us and not for anyone else? I was confused, and frustrated, and devastated. Now what? We needed to decide what direction to take from there. I felt helpless because the problem wasn't really with me and there was nothing I could do to fix it. I was frustrated because...